Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
Ohhh, TODAY your worried. Becasue last weekend when we warned you about her you said "shes too hot to have herpes."
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
The beers last night were like the tears from god
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
Your stoned with a 2 year old in the room....and that makes you want to have babies?!
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
Randomize
