Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
I haven't been this hungover since you found me laying in front of your door gagging with pepto bismal tablets scattered around me
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
