how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
Randomize
