God I can't wait to have my phone textbombed every night
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
He was fingering me and I came so hard that I actually broke his wrist. We're at the ER now.
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
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