DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
I got her a Nickelback box set.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
I wish him all the best and hope one day he can afford the surgery to remove his head from his ass
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
You haven't lived until you've watched a retriever try to bring back the condom you just threw in its master's garbage
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
If I stopped drinking I'd have to take up murdering.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
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