absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
dude, the reading rainbow guy was just talking to a HOLOGRAM
Are you sure you're not watching Star Trek?
wait... oh
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
Thank you for coming with me today. I find it appropriate that we celebrated my negative pregnancy test with slurpees and donuts.
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
Randomize
