Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
Please don't give away my fajitas
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
Randomize
