My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
Randomize
