he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
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