hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
That bad?
Full length cargo pants, running shoes, and a partial unibrow. Alcohol really is blinding.
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
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