I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
When you can pee with one hand accurately while texting, you drink too much.
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
Don't forget to make sex 3rd on your calander
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Randomize
