Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
im as drunk as the barefoot contessa. GET TO MY LEVEL
dude. stop pregaming the food network.
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
Randomize
