Plan B is the new Plan A
So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Randomize
