marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
I have demons in me.
I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
Randomize
