Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Randomize
