I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
she looked like the before picture.
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
Randomize
