I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
All I know is when I asked you how many fingers I was holding up, you said "Hippo"
Randomize