Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
