i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
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