Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
apparently the secret to your success is patron
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
Randomize
