puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
may have given a homeless man 70 dollars in exchange for his sandals. so yea, i'm going as jesus for next halloween.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
he gave me a flinstones gummy vitamin and was like, "ya know.. because of ebola."
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
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