I can't breathe out the right side of my face
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
Come see our sink grown plant.
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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