That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
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