But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
...oh my god that's like anal suicide
I'm aware. I'm writing the eulogy for my colon as we speak.
Dude i swear to christ if he sends me one more pic of a "magnificent dump" im changing my number
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
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