I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
Our new roommate is sitting in the living room wearing a snuggie and clutching a handle of burnett's mixed with what appears to be crystal light and sobbing over a documentary about a dead race horse.
I know. Isn't she utterly fantastic?
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
Randomize
