I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
he quoted the bible to break up with me
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
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