Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
Of the 4 nights I've gone downtown this week, I've been "piss in the parking lot" drunk 5 times
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
He updated Facebook... "Got a new phone today." WHAT ABOUT THE FUCKING KID YOU HAD?!
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize