The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
Umm I'm too high to move.
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
We made a pact to go to the nursing home together... that way we could stay high till the bitter end. Do you not remember?
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize