I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
I'm driving in the middle of nowhere, and I just saw a stuffed Barney hanging from a noose on a tree. Maybe I should turn around.
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
