you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
Housekeeping called in a homicide detective. Just spent an hour explaining that we had vigorous hotel vacation sex five times, even though I was having a heavy flow day. It'll definitely be what you call a memorable honeymoon.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
Randomize
