They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
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