I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
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