I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
I am mentally ready for anal.
Randomize
