Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
I told my boyfriend my favorite food was strawberry poptarts, now my email inbox is getting spammed with nude pics of him with his dick in a poptart box..
I wish the iPhone would register texts from 11:59 as "Last Year" instead of "Yesterday."
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
I looked into this "it's just lunch" matchmaker thing and it was like 5 grand. If I'm gonna spend five grand I'll throw in another three and get new tits and find my own fucking husband.
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
