mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
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