I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
Randomize
