I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
her roommate was in the bathroom for over an hour so i volunteered to take the dog out and i shit in the bushes
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
Randomize
