All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
Randomize
