"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
yeah well we're currently on the phone and she's telling me about how much she misses me and all this shit and i muted myself and i'm watching porn.
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
Public service announcement: if you would like to continue receiving blow jobs, a 25% increase in fuck-giving will be expected immediately, and you're expected to give an actual flying fuck at least once a week. Brought to you by the ad council.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
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