okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
do you know why i have a volvo grill taped to the back of my car?
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
Accidentally gagged on my toothbrush and puked up a Walgreen's cheeseburger. 1) I am not going to be on top of my game tonight. 2) Since when do I have a gag reflex? 3) Walgreen's cheeseburgers are awesome.
I was out with the drag queens until 7am. This is the hangover I needed to kick my ass back to sobriety. Dear Virgin Mary, fuck my life.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
One of my interns found me on Grindr. I'm really gonna make him earn the absurd amount of money I pay him.
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
