I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
Randomize
