Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
I just left a 3 minute voicemail to the guy I want to fuck baby talking my cats and I don't know if I can delete it 😐
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
Randomize
