I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
Two words: nipple clamps
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