I looked at my own cervix.
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
even my farts smell like vagina
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
You spilled spaghetti on the floor, and kept telling the noodles to "settle down" as you tried to clean it up
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
Randomize
