my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
As i was blowing him Silent Night came on his iTunes. I said "it isn't christmas" and he moans "yeah it is."
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
Randomize