Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
Xanax and allergy medicine look a lot alike when you spill them on the floor. Just saying that I still have allergies but I'm unsure if I still have legs
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
Todays life lesson brought to you by last nights half pitchers of cheap sangria: you'll never get the stain or the SMELL of sangria vomit out of your bedroom carpet.
Houston, we have a blender
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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