whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
he quoted the bible to break up with me
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
found a better reason to procrastinate than the usual sunday-don't-give-no-fucks. literally every one of my textbooks is soaked in captain. can't turn a page without gagging.
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
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