We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
she gave me a handjob in the middle of the night and my stomach growled so she walked out totally naked and came back 5 minutes later with two sandwiches. who the fuck says getting married is awful?
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
seriously i don't trust him. he fed me a hot dog out of a crock pot and gave me moonshine dashed jager bombs.
Randomize
