thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
He walked upstairs in nothing but his boxers and drunkenly asked my brother for a condom....so much for a good first impression.
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
Randomize
