I wish I only lived at night.
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
I considered my 2012 starting right when the cop followed the wrong car for the bottle rocket we shot at him
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
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